i would like to take this opportunity to formally invite all who read this blog to please register their superpowers with me. i have developed a new team-based mentality about superhero work, and i believe the first step is for us to know what exactly we're working with. of course, please feel free to register under your superhero name if you wish to maintain the integrity of your secret identity. i don't want all that responsibility anyway. all you have to do is comment with your super-name and any powers/skills you posses that you feel can help save the world. i will start by registering myself here:
powers: very low blood pressure, amazing make-out intuition, the power to find humor in ANY situation, the uncanny ability to sense others' superpowers, and "natural moves"*
skills: massage, beverage invention/construction, karaoke, extensive aquatic skills*
*this list is complete to my knowledge as of this posting and does not include powers/skills that may yet manifest/be acquired
i am also taking suggestions on names for our league of superheroes.
you may be reading this thinking, "i don't have any superpowers." well, let me tell you, we live in a time of unprecedented superpower manifestation and i am willing to bet you DO have powers. and you know you have skills! it's time to start using them to battle evil!
thank you for your participation.
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Powers: Mad first aid skills, Incredible balance, Memory like a steel trap, Excellent navigational skills, A very advanced sense of humor, Amazing judge of musical talent and ability.
Since you can sense my powers, I won't disclose to the rest of the public, But I would like to disclose SOME of the skills important to your superhero camaraderie...
1. keen alertness to 4 senses. I would identify them, however it would leave me vulnerable to my one weakness. (everyone has kryptonite)
2. immeasurable analytical brain capacity.
3. untested, unchallenged humor radar. People who have a unique, fresh, and unpolluted sense of humor CLING to me.
4. I can also type like the wind while having conversations with others on unaffiliated topics.
and this is just the beginning.
hello gorgeous...
first.. my identiy will be revealed later on
second.. I am a super hero with a super villan alter ego
third .. due to the fact that Im off saving the world... you will just have to wait and find out what my super powers are..
Alright. Superpowers. I'm all over this. First of all, when I was just a wee lad I was struck by lighting and was granted divine hubris. I have the fantastic ability to increase my arm muscle while increasing my tum fat. I can run slower than anyone.
Unlike other humans my stomach dictates my behavior. Not with food like others but with horrifying anxiety pangs that stop me in my tracks.
I am very good at shmoozing and making an impression but it has the opposite effect of making me scared of the other person.
I dance like a stork, I sing like a mac truck, and I have abnormally large hands and feet.
My kryptonite is commitment. any kind. to a sports team, a beverage company. doesn't matter. Ties set off the stomach pangs.
So yeah. oh, and I can carry heavy stuff. So that's a plus. Also I have bionic eyes that were lasered by a real doctor in a real office.
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